A Breath of Fresh Air

Today was such a fantastic day. I said to Jared tonight, "The parent side of me just feels so refreshed today. Like maybe we can all make it out of this 'raising a family' business alive." (Sane? Maybe asking too much...)

We spent the morning in our schools parking lot, bound and determined to get Sam up and cruising on two wheels. And she did it. 

Sam has always been incredibly timid. She's come such a long way that sometimes people don't believe me or think I must be exaggerating. But it is something that has caused many a struggle. Learning new things always takes a very large dosage of patience, persistence and firm encouragement. 

She had a moment when we started where she was getting weepy and a little self-pitying and I gently and firmly told her "Nope, not today, Sam. Put it away and let's do this. I know you can get this. I promise, once you get it, it's so easy, and you were so close last time we tried, I know we can do this today." 

And we got it.

The look of accomplishment on her face after--I tell you it is one of the most priceless moments as a parent. 

And on top of that, I felt so proud of myself for not getting frustrated with her and felt really connected with my Dad. It just brought back so many memories of Dad teaching me new things and I know that the firm encouragement is something I've definitely been on the other side of. 

We decided to celebrate by all going together to the FamilyFavourites movie presentation at the movie theater. It was only $10 for all six of us to get in and Joel thankfully nursed and slept through the entire thing. 

In any family, but especially one with four kids, the dynamics of 6 personalities under one roof can be difficult to balance. And in this "young family" stage, we compensate for that by switching up and splitting up. When one of us needs to run out to do an errand, two kids go with, two kids stay. When Nana asks for a play date, a different pair go each time. Arguing in the van starts to amp up? We switch the car seats around. 

But today there was almost no fighting or arguing and we were able to spend the whole day together. 

We came home, had a late lunch, and were having such a great day that we just packed up and ran out the door again and headed to the corn maze. 

I'm so thankful for this day. Such a bright light in the midst of tantrums, messy floors and poopy diapers.

Day 114

My first Throwback Thursday today. All four kids within their first day of life. Clockwise from top left: Samantha, Travis, Joel and Bryce. 

Samantha: Age 6

Favourites:

Cereal: Fruit loops (you have Rice Krispies every day)

Vegetable: carrots

Drink:  hot chocolate

Toy: Caroline (American girl)

TV Show: Bugs Bunny

Movie: Saige Paints The Sky (American girl)

Game: Twister

Book: The Night I Followed The Dog

Restaurant: Red Robin's

Holiday: My birthday

Animal: kittens

Colour: pink

If you could change your name, what would you choose? Victoria

What do you love about each person in our family? Travis: he's funny. Bryce: he's funny. Dad: he's funny. Mom: she loves us. Joel: he's cute

Where would you like to go on vacation this year? Ontario

What are some of your wishes for this year? To go ice skating. Go camping. 

A New Year

As 2013 is coming to a close, I'm feeling some very mixed emotions. 

On one hand, it's been a very rough year, and I'm welcoming that feeling of "starting fresh" that comes with the new year. On the other hand, leaving this year behind and heading into one that Dad will never be a part of is painful. 

But there's a lot to look forward to in 2014. With the closing of 2013 we also say goodbye to the newborn days, and head into the more exciting days of babyhood. I'm looking forward to watching Joel develop and getting those first glimpses at his personality. Each of our children are so unique and I'm excited to see which traits Joel will have and how they will all mesh together for him and how that will work in our family.

Samantha will be 6 very soon and I'm enjoying being witness to her development through kindergarten, both intellectually and socially. It's so hard to believe how painfully shy she once was when I watch her at school now. 

Travis is starting a more difficult and less desirable stage. Our boy who used to eat anything and drink an 8 ounce bottle of milk in 30 seconds (NO exaggeration...) has become an increasingly picky eater and is testing his boundaries. He's become very vocal and defiant. It's all a part of the learning curve and for the most part, we're finding a good balance between discipline and letting him be heard but we've had a few embarrassing moments in public and I'm sure there are a few more to come. But, he is still our sweet joker and makes us laugh daily. 

And Bryce. He can be a very typical youngest child at times. He's also testing his boundaries, but takes it out more on his siblings than his parents right now. He will often wait for Travis to put down a toy, and in one motion, snatch it from the ground, turn and bolt, simply because he knows it will make Travis mad and he'll take off after him. He is a happy-go-lucky boy who is always smiling (except when he's throwing a tantrum) and skipping around everywhere. 

How are you feeling heading into the new year? What are you looking forward to?

Highlights

Today, during Sunday School, Travis covered half his head in soap while he was in the bathroom. Thankfully, his aunt was his Sunday School teacher and washed as much of it out in the sink as she could. 

On the drive home tonight, just a couple blocks from our house (Sam is very directional and can tell how close our house is from any direction), Sam was being quite rude so I said "I can pull the van over and let you out here." to which she replied "Well, I could just walk home."

Oh how these kids of mine keep me on my toes...

Back To School

First day of Kindergarten by herself

Thankfully, both kids have started school without a single issue. Sam seems to be doing fine with full days (minus one tired meltdown at home after the first full day, but we are completely expecting some of that!), and Travis couldn't wait for me to leave him at school on his first day. He may as well have kicked me out the door!

First day of 3-year-old Preschool

This is such a reflective time for me. On Tuesday, I picked Sam up at the same time as I dropped Travis off, and since his class was only an hour long, I gave her the option to go home and rest (Jared was at home!) or come to Walmart with me, and she opted to rest at home. So we drove home and I just pulled up in front of the house to let her out. She hopped out, said "Bye, Mom!", blew me a kiss and marched up the stairs. She looked like such a big girl to me.

Travis, as well. We parked at the school, I unbuckled him and let him out of the car, and he threw on his backpack and waved "Bye, Mom!" at me like I was just going to drop him off and let him find his own way to his classroom!

You may have noticed that I've been adding tags to some of my posts to help me find certain things a little easier (as a side note: JUST DO THIS WHEN YOU START YOUR BLOG AND SAVE YOURSELF THE HEADACHE!!), so I've been combing through tons of old posts and going through all sorts of old memories and it just really hits home, how much our kids have grown and how it's gone by in such a blur!

Oh, babies, don't grow up too quickly!!

Life Lately

I feel like we have such a busy summer this year! Does it get busier and busier as the kids get older?! I'm assuming it does, so I guess I should get used to it!

Where to start? So much has been going on lately! 

The older two kids are doing a half day camp through the YMCA this week and I'm so glad that I put them in. They've been having lots of fun and learning lots of new  things about the ocean and everything in it since it's a beach themed camp. It's also been great to have a little mini preview into how Travis is going to do in preschool in the fall. I wouldn't say it's really giving me much of a break  at home though, since I'm now Bryce's only source of entertainment, but I'm enjoying getting to spend some one-on-one time with my littlest monkey.

I went into nesting mode about two months ago and I think it's one of my favourite parts of pregnancy! My entire house has been purged and organized! It feels so refreshing to get rid of things we don't need and it kicked us into gear to get some of our rooms patched and painted that have been put on hold for a while. It feels great to start personalizing our home a little bit more and painting over the colours that we didn't like with ones we've chosen ourselves. We still have a bit of work to do in our room, but it's a lot easier and faster to get done on a day when the kids are at Nana's so it'll have to wait for a little bit longer.

Pregnancy wise, everything is great. We had a little bit of a scare after our ultrasound, but after going for some additional blood work, we were relieved to find out that baby is just fine. It was a difficult and stressful week, though.

Next week is supposed to be HOT, so I think we'll be hunkering down inside and possibly hitting up a friends pool to try and beat the heat. Hopefully I won't melt!

Samantha, Age: 5

Favorites:

Cereal: Daddy's favorite cereal (raisin bran)
Vegetable: I don't have a favorite vegetable (carrots if you have to choose)
Drink: strawberry juice (little do you know it has vegetables in it...)
Toy: Barbies
TV Show: Ellen (atta girl!)
Game: Snakes & Ladders
Book: The Princess & The Frog (large book of Princess stories)
Restaurant: Wendy's
Holiday: Christmas
Animal: kittens
Colour: pink & purple


If you could change your name, what would you choose? Alexis


What do you love about each person in our family? I like that Bryce is goofy and I like that you and Dad make us supper and lunch and breakfast and I like that Bailey eats her food nicely and I like that Travis is always playing with me when I'm down stairs.


Where would you like to go on vacation this year? To see Danielle


What are some of your wishes for this year? A Barbie house with all of the stuff that we have at our house but not the computer. Actually with the computer and with a kid barbie and a dad barbie. But Travis has to be careful not to break their legs.

My (not so) Little Girl

Darn, she's grown up a LOT, all in the last month it feels like. It makes me sad to think about how grown up she's getting.

Some nights she lets us know she's tired and she's going to go get ready for bed. All by herself. Just like that. Turns around to walk up the stairs and says "Goodnight Mom."

What?!

Where did my little baby go?!

She says big girl things like "It's not FAIR!" and "Travis isn't playing nicely today."

The way she's handled her cracked collarbone (for which she'll have another X-Ray on Monday) has been impressive. Obviously it was pretty sore the first few days, but when she asked for medicine, I only had to explain once why I'd rather not give her any unless she REALLY needed it, and that was the last time she asked until bedtime. She wasn't too happy about being told over and over that no, she couldn't do this, and she couldn't do that because of her injury, but who would be? And it really didn't take long for her to get over it and find something else that she could do.

She still loves to have Jared and I come in and give her a hug and a kiss goodnight, and she still does love to snuggle so I guess I'll just have to hold even tighter to these things. "They" always say it goes so fast, and we all know it does, but sometimes it still catches you off guard just how quickly those baby days fly by.

It happened...

Well, we've had our first major injury in the family. Made it 4.25 years--not too bad considering we have three kids!

Sam slipped off the couch last night and cracked her collarbone. It was one of those total freak accidents. She wasn't even jumping or standing on the couch. Just laying down and she twisted and slipped off and just landed right on her shoulder. 

It didn't look like anything really, to the point where after she'd been whining for a few minutes (she wasn't even really crying) I told her that it was time to stop and let's all go downstairs and play for a bit. I even had her raise her arms up to make sure and she did that just fine which made me believe even more that she was just being a little over dramatic. But when she still was refusing to participate in playing 15 minutes after her fall, Jared called her over to take an even closer look and noticed that there was a bump on her collarbone. Having broken his own collarbone when he was a teenager, he knew we needed to at least take her in to get an X-Ray. 

Thankfully, it isn't fully broken, just a crack, but it still means she needs to take it easy for the next month or so, more to prevent another fall, which could cause a full break, than anything else. It's a little daunting trying to prevent a 4-year-old from falling. Even tripping could mean a full break because she would naturally try to brace herself using her hands. Having just moved to a house with 3 floors and Sam taking after me in the clutziness department, I'm a little worried. 

Overall, she's doing just fine. More than anything she's pretty bummed that she won't be able to play on Nana's newly finished swing set or play at the park that's, quite literally, in our backyard, for the next month. She's a little sore but I'm trying not to give her any medication for it since she then forgets about the pain and starts using her arm more which isn't going to help it heal at all. She doesn't need a sling or a brace or anything since it's not actually broken. She's just supposed to keep still.

So, if you have any great indoor activities, I would love to hear about them. We're going to need something to do over the next month. And if anyone wants to volunteer to come and take Travis to the park so I don't have to torture Samantha by bringing her along and making her sit there and watch him play, that would be great!

It's the end of January already.

Well, we had our very last midwife appointment on Wednesday. It was sad! I miss my midwives and their care already. But, our family is complete and it's time to move on. And I do love our family doctor as well, so we're still in very good care :o)

The midwives scale was way off for some reason so I'm not even going to mention it. I had him weighed at the health unit the day before, and the midwife's scale put him over 100 grams below his weight at the health unit whose scale has been consistent with our doctors. Bryce is now weighing in at 8lbs 10oz. He's so tiny! Our doctor is still a little concerned about his weight, mostly just because of the big drop he took during his first couple of weeks and he just hasn't caught up as much as we'd like to see. So we're giving him a few ounces of formula per day just to help get some extra fat under his wrinkles. Aside from that he's doing really well.

He's still very alert when he's awake and he's getting to the point where he likes to stay awake for an hour or so once he's done eating now. The kids are really enjoying getting some time to interact with him. Samantha is such a doting big sister and Travis is so heart warming to watch with his little brother. He's a rough-and-tumble boy, so he's still latching to the concept of "gentle" but he loves to give Bryce his soother and if he sees any spit rags or blankies laying around he always comes running over shouting "Key! Key!" (blankie)

Travis is starting to expand his vocabulary a bit more now. He's still mostly discernible only to us but he says most of our families names quite well and he's starting to use more than one word at a time now. It's so different from Samantha, I find myself often wondering if he isn't falling behind, but then we see progress in areas, and I'm reassured that this is what's normal for kids, especially boys, his age. Samantha was always very far ahead of other kids her age when it came to speech.

Samantha is also doing very well. Hopefully I'm not speaking too soon, but I think we may actually be just starting to come out of the long dark tunnel that is the 2's and 3's. I often find myself very frustrated with Samantha because she is so smart, so I feel like she should learn from her mistakes more quickly. But, she is still 4 and she does have the same characteristics of any four year old. And she should. And in all honesty, she is a very well behaved four year old. She remembers her please and thank you's better than most, she's respectful (which is a must for my kids) and she does listen the first time more often than not. I'm definitely trying to work on remembering these things during the times when I'm frustrated. I'm not very good at it, though. 

I'm a passionate, emotional person. My brain gets wrapped up in what my heart is feeling in the moment and I can't easily separate the two, which is kind of important when you want your head to be thinking of an action other than the one you're seeing in front of you. All in all, I've found these last couple of years very trying with Samantha. So, hopefully we're coming to the end of this stage and I can practice patience during these last months. I'm sure I'll need it in the future. If these last few years are any indication, she's going to be just like me. And I don't think I'll handle jewelry box sized holes in the back of her door very well.

You're 4!!

Four years. One thousand, four hundred, sixty-one days. I can't believe you've been in my life for that long. You're growing up so quickly. 

Over the last year we've asked you a few times whether or not you wanted to get your ears pierced. I explained that it would hurt, but told you that whenever you were ready, we could go and get them done. Up until a couple of months ago, your answer was always "No, I want to wait until I'm bigger." But, sometime in October, while we were walking through Winners, you saw the little pink heart-shaped boxes that hold the kids jewelry and you said "Mom, I want to get my ears pierced now!" I said that we could talk about it with Dad and maybe we could get them done for your birthday.

I did some research and picked a great place to get them done in Langley and made an appointment for your birthday. But, on New Years Day, we had nothing better to do so we headed out to Langley to do some shopping and while we were there I figured we could ask if there was any way we could get it done then. So, we got them done and you were so brave! You didn't cry at all until your ears were actually pierced and you settled down quite quickly.

You're coming out of your shell more and more these days and as much as I still think it's going to be a transition, there are days when I can picture you doing very well in school next year. I have very mixed emotions about this coming fall.

You became a big sister again a few weeks ago. Well, Bryce was born four weeks ago, but you've loved him for longer than that. I loved hearing you talk about "the five of us" before he was here, and I've loved watching you with a baby around the house again. You're so loving and gentle with Bryce and so wild and crazy with Travis.

Travis has definitely had an influence on you during this last year. You love having someone to play with and you love to read to him. He frustrates you, but you enjoy having him around.

You still ask more questions than any child in the history of the universe--not an exaggeration. Even your aunts say you ask the most questions of anyone they've ever known. On the rare occasion you're not asking questions, you're still verbalizing in one way or another--singing, speaking for your dolls, or just making random noise.

I love you more than anything, you drive me crazy, you make my heart melt, you make me laugh, you make me cry. You are my only daughter and I want to have a special kind of relationship with you. I want to try harder over this next year to set a great foundation for the teenage years that await us. I want to strive to find the balance between being Mom and being a friend. I want you to know that you can tell me anything and I'll always be here for anything you need.

I love you, Samantha!

Who's Who?

Everyone's been asking me who I think Bryce looks more like, Samantha or Travis, and I keep saying "I don't know. I don't guess anymore when they're this little!" Even looking back at Sam and Travis' newborn pictures, I can't even see them in there. Once they're a couple of months old, it's a lot easier. But, for everyone's enjoyment, here's photos of all three kids from when they were in the hospital. 

Samantha

Travis

Bryce

It seems that half the people think he looks like Sam, and half say Travis. The one thing that everyone does comment on is how tiny he is. He has such a different build than our other kids. He's so scrawny and his limbs look like chicken bones! He's definitely going to have to be a scrapper to compete with his brother!

The 5 Of Us

I've wondered at times through this pregnancy whether or not it will feel the way I've always imagined once this baby's here. Will I feel that sense of completeness as soon as I see our last baby on my chest? Will it feel like everyone's here now?

Some days I look at our kids playing and think that maybe it would have been possible for me to be satisfied with having just Samantha and Travis. Most of the time though, it still feels like someone is missing.

As often as I have said that I desperately want another girl so that she and Samantha can have that sisterly bond that I have always longed for, knowing Travis and having seen him develop into the character that he is, I can definitely see where another boy would fit so perfectly into our family. I've become incredibly content with the idea of another boy or another girl. I know that whoever it is that joins our family in a few short days (fingers crossed people!) has been tailor made for us. They will be the perfect addition.

The crazy thing is, Samantha can feel that, too. In these last few weeks she's begun to speak often of "the five of us".

I wrote this past summer about the way that she stunned me with her unexpected display of true love for her Dad during a phone call while we were in Ontario, and yet she's surprising me still with her love. 

She knows this little person no more than we do. She doesn't know if it's a boy or a girl, she doesn't know their name, but she feels their presence in our family already and she loves him/her the same way she loves me, her Dad and Travis.

We cuddled up in our big bed the other night to watch The Polar Express. The kids brought their blankies, I popped some popcorn, gave them their little bowls and cups and we all snuggled down in the blankets and pillows, just the four of us. And what is Samantha thinking about? 

"Next year when we watch this movie at Christmas time, all five of us will be on the bed!"

It's hard enough for me to imagine this little person being a part of our family and what that will look like, and then there's my three-year-old daughter, already picturing the five of us together a year from now, cuddled up having a movie night on Mom and Dad's bed.

(Sorry about picture quality. iPhone+low light)

Social Media and Pregnancy

Ahhh, social media. Such a love-hate relationship we have. 

I love being able to keep in contact with all of our family that is spread across this continent. I love being able to keep friendships alive during times when life gets so busy that it's impossible to find time to connect in person for weeks at a time. I've even been able to build and strengthen friendships through Facebook.

I've also had friendships crumble, partly due to Facebook. Though, of course, a friendship that falls apart can never be entirely blamed on Facebook. It's likely that it wasn't a very good friendship even before Facebook was involved.

I have quite a few Facebook "friends" and I like it that way. In general, I don't mind at all if someone wants to keep tabs on what my family and I have been up to--I'm the same way! My one "requirement" it seems, is that if I see you out and about, I expect that you want to come and say "Hello."

Facebook  is a wonderful way to keep in contact with more people than would be possible otherwise. It doesn't replace the connections that we make with people in a face-to-face relationship. If you're not going to give me the time of day when I see you at the grocery store, then why should I feel like I owe it to you to accept your friend request on a social media portal? Clearly we're not actually friends. I wouldn't consider you an acquaintance if you wouldn't even say "Hello" to me at the mall!

When pregnancy is involved, things get even...funnier? I've tracked other friends' pregnancies through Facebook and been able to see the way that our mutual friends connect with them throughout their pregnancies as well as having experienced these relationships during my own pregnancies. There are certain people who suddenly seem incredibly more invested in your life when you announce a pregnancy. And I do  understand it. Everyone loves babies!

The thing that gets to me is the expectation that they have to always be in the know. Or the people who announce your baby's arrival for you. And how quickly they become disinterested in your life once Baby is a couple of months old.

That second one really gets to me. Every parent has the right to share their own news, so when I see "Congratulations so-and-so and welcome here Baby ______!" and I go to "so-and-so's" page to write my own congratulations only to find out that they haven't said a word about the arrival of their baby, it drives me a little crazy. Actually, it drives me a lot crazy.

I've carried my baby for nine months and just labored for hours to bring them out and into this world and I'm not even the one that gets to shout it from the rooftops?! Somehow it feels like I got gypped just a little bit.

It may very well be that this is just one of those things that gets to me that other people seem to have no problem with. But, either way, in the weeks leading up to the end of my pregnancy, I've taken steps to ensure that I can share my own big news by disabling the ability for anyone else to post on my Wall, and I guess I'm just left to hope that people will respect our rights enough to not tag us in a status update revealing that we have in fact had our baby.

I can't wait to share the news with all of our friends, and Facebook is definitely one of the first places I think of to make that possible. But, we also want that window of time to be able to share the news more personally with our close friends and relatives.

Have you ever experienced anything similar? Did you take any extra steps to preserve your own rights, or was it just not a big deal to you?

Oh the fun to be had at Nana & Opa's Farm

Jared had an excavator at the farm to do some work recently so of course the kids all had to have their turn helping Uncle Jared/Daddy! 

For some reason I can't seem to find the photo's I took of Kyra :o( But, Jared told me later that the first thing she said was "Can we squish something?!"

Samantha is always skeptical about these types of things but she trusts her Daddy.

Travis and tractors. This boy will never get enough

Jayce told Uncle Jared that the dirt had to go in the dump truck. In a pile on the ground just wasn't good enough!

Getting a ride back up to the house in style. I LOVE the look on Kyra's face in this photo!

Love Is In The Air

Last night we made some warm drinks and went for a random drive as we love to do. Sam asked me part way through our drive:

S-"Mom, why did you marry my dad?"

M-"Because I love your dad."

S-"But he toots and farts all the time so you can't love him!"

Past, Present & Future

I feel like I never talk about Samantha on this blog anymore. I guess because I prefer the stages that I'm in with the other two kids to the one we're at with Samantha. I love being pregnant, I love the 6 months to 2 year range where everything is a new experience, and I loathe the 2 year to...I don't even know what age. When does the attitude end?!?!?!

But, I've had some unique conversations with our daughter recently. Some that make me shudder, others that make me proud and some that make me a little bit of both since they bring out some terrifying similarities the two of us share. Today we've had a few of these experiences already and it's only 1:00pm.
 

Travis had shots yesterday and has been a little clingy and crabby today because of them so I decided to take the kids for a little drive (an experience all on its own that involves a drivers side window falling out of its track on a crisp Autumn day only halfway through our drive...) just to break up the day a little. So since I had a Starbucks card laying around and I'm lazy when it comes to getting out of the car to order a coffee just to get back in and drive back home, we headed to a Starbucks a little further away that had a drive-thru. (Someone tell me I'm not the only one that does this and I'll feel a little bit better about myself.) So as we're driving through the parking lot after receiving my Earl Grey Tea Latte, Sam pipes up from the back "Mom, something in here smells like Fruit Loops!" which made me smile because everyone else has always called me crazy when I tell them that Starbucks Earl Grey Tea smells like Fruit Loops to me :o)

After lunch today, as I am trying to sweep up the ever present remnants left on the floor, Sam is trying to squish past me and the conversation went as follows:

Me: Sam where are you trying to go?!

Sam: (with attitude dripping from every word--nay, syllable) I'm just going to wash my hands!

Me: Oh, okay, thank you.

Sam: Mom, I don't always want to have to tell you where I'm going all the time!

Me: Well, I'm the Mom so you should probably get used to it.

Sam: Well, I'm the kid!

Yesterday, after a particularily exhausting morning due to unintentional consumption of caffeine before bed, a very early wake-up call from Travis and shots already having been completed, I sat down on the couch to put my feet up and Sam was going to the bathroom.

Sam: Mom, come wipe me.

Me: Sam, wipe yourself please.

Sam: No, I pooped!

Me: Okay, but you can still wipe yourself.

Sam: No I can't. Poop is too dirty for me!

Me: Samantha, what are you going to do when you're four or five?!

Sam: Well, then I'll wipe myself!

Me: Okay well you can start practicing now.

Sam: No! I'm not going to get down until you come and wipe me!

Me: Well, you're going to be there for a while.

She keeps calling me over the next two minutes or so until finally I hear a very audible sigh from the other end of the house and the toilet flushing a few seconds after that.

Oh, this girl and I. I love her so fiercely that it hurts, and she frustrates me to no end. Which is probably completely bewildering to some people because in general (every one of us, child or not, have our days), she is a really good kid. She's very polite and often  remembers her please and thank you's without being prompted, she's sweeter than cake, she's so full of love for all of her family.

But she's so much like me. Which includes many of the traits that bother me about myself, and as a Mom, when you see those things that gave you difficulty growing up, or still give you difficulty today, part of you wants to try and teach them to stop being that way just to make their lives a little bit easier. But, I'm realizing more and more that that's not the answer. 

We are the way we are. We can change and shape pieces of our personality but we can't remove any of those pieces. I need to try to teach Sam how to deal with not being able to make herself stop talking, ever, and asking a bajillion questions (or often asking the same question in a bajillion different ways...),  how to deal with the need  to give people advice on how things could be done better. 

Some of these things I think I've learned to deal with, others I'm definitely still working on, and some are still a daily struggle. Seeing these things already in Sam at such a young age has helped me to realize that I need to go easier on both of us since apparently, it is just a part of who we are and it's always been that way.

Samantha is helping me understand what I've heard many times before. There really is so much to learn from your children. If only learning from witnessing others was something I did well, these years might be a little easier for me :o) Where do you learn these life lessons from if you're never a parent?!

Belly Pics

Samantha at 22 weeks:

I was horrible at taking belly photos when I was pregnant with her so this is the only photo I have from around this time. The next time I took one, I was already full term.

Travis at 25 weeks:

And at 27 weeks + 5 days:

C3PO at 23 weeks + 1 day:

And at 28 weeks + 1 day:

When I was pregnant with Travis, he took up all of the space possible. So I popped early and hung out there for quite a while and then suddenly he started to push out and I really popped. 

This baby, however, is taking up so little space, still. When I'm laying down and you place your hands on either side of my belly you can push on each side alternately and my belly moves side to side like jello. Same goes for the top of my uterus. The top 4 inches or so of my uterus is filled with nothing but fluid. So my belly has been very round for quite some time, but it's stayed like that since.

My pregnancy itself is far more similar to Samantha's but I'm carrying much more like I did with Travis. By the end of my pregnancy with Samantha, I had a major cone belly! I looked huge! So, who knows, boy or girl? Guess we'll find out in a few more months!

Perfection

I wonder what this baby will look like.

As parents, we don't always see what others see. When we look at our kids, especially when they're brand new, we tend to see only perfection. It's not a bad thing at all! But I remember after we had Samantha, Jared and I were over-the-moon, smitten, head-over-heels, in love with our daughter. She was perfect in every way possible. Not to say that we don't think so now; she is perfectly who God made her to be and imperfect in the same way that we all are. But I remember when Sam was a little older, Jared and I were looking back at some of her first photos and we both had the same thought:

"Wow, people were being kind when they said how they thought she was so cute!"

Look at me, all anemic and still smiling!

But, still, she was so perfect in our eyes! She couldn't possibly get any more beautiful or cute!

And then we had Travis. And he, too, couldn't have been more perfect in any way.

Less anemic but burst every single blood vessel in my face. Go me!

So now I am left to wonder. We've had a girl and a boy, neither of whom could have possibly been made more perfect images of the two of us. So how is this little guy or girl going to be just as perfect?

Because I know they will be! ☺